As a piece of shameless publicity, Ask Jeeves has published the top 10 most ‘unanswerable’ questions. So, in retaliation, here are the answers. Feel free to correct my answers if you know better.
1. What is the meaning of life?
To make ourselves and the world better.
2. Is there a God?
Doesn’t matter, so long as we’re clear about the answer to (1).
3. Do blondes have more fun?
Depends what they’re doing.
4. What is the best diet?
Eat less. Unless you’re anorexic in which case you should eat more.
5. Is there anybody out there?
6. Who is the most famous person in the world?
Justin Bieber. And that tells you everything you need to know about fame.
7. What is love?
Nature’s way of making us less selfish so that we can have more than one person alive on the planet at the same time.
8. What is the secret to happiness?
Act nice. Think nice. And watch your back.
9. Did Tony Soprano die?
Yes, unless there’s a lot of money in another series sometime in the future.
10. How long will I live?
Long enough, if you get on with things. Not long enough, if you waste time.